


Fault

by probsnothawkeye



Category: Dimension 20 (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Survivors Guilt, father daughter bonding, over loss, spoilers for acoc episode 9, this episode really fucked me up yall
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2020-06-11
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:28:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24656134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/probsnothawkeye/pseuds/probsnothawkeye
Summary: Loss seemed to follow the Rocks family .Amethar and Ruby discuss loss and fault.
Relationships: Ruby Rocks & Amethar Rocks
Comments: 4
Kudos: 24





	Fault

**Author's Note:**

> Hello hello!  
> I'm still crying over this episode as I write this  
> I am all kinds of fucked up and it is causing me to dip into writing Dimension 20 fanfic  
> So here's my first work in this fandom  
> Enjoy my tears

The battle that followed the death of her sister was able to occupy Ruby’s mind for the moment.

But that battle, that moment, had to end eventually.

They were to leave for the Stone Candy Mountains in the morning, with one final night at Castle Candy in order to prepare provisions and troops for the hike up. One final night in her room,  _ their _ room. Ruby sat down on her Jet’s bed, staring out the window, sobbing silently.

_ It’s your fault. You left her. You didn’t help. It’s your fault. All your fault, all your fault, all your fault, all- _

A knock at the door stirred her from the thoughts swirling around her head. Ruby turned towards the door and saw her father standing in the doorway. “Can I come in?” Ruby nodded, patting the space beside her on the bed and leaning against her dad as he sat down. “How are you doing?”

“Bad,” Ruby said, sniffling and wiping her eyes. “Very bad.”

Amethar pressed a kiss to his daughter’s forehead. “I know. I know.” He looked off, out the same window Ruby had been looking out, thinking about his own losses. His sisters, his daughter. And for what?

“Dad?”

“Yes?”

“How… how do you…” Ruby trailed off, unsure of what she was really looking to ask. “How do you deal with loss when it’s your fault?”

Amethar stiffened, pulling away from his daughter and turning to look her in the eyes. “What do you mean, Ruby? What was your fault?”

Tears started gathering in Ruby’s eyes again. “Jet was my fault, Dad. She went down and I just ran. I ran away, I didn’t stay with her or try to help her. I cast invisibility and just left her there. If I had stayed, if I had done something,  _ anything _ … It’s all my fault. It’s my fault she’s gone.”

“No.” Amethar said firmly, putting his hands on Ruby’s shoulders. “No, that’s not true. That’s not true at all.”

“But-”

“No!” Amethar said, squeezing her shoulders. “You listen to me, okay? I know it’s hard, it’s hard to have your sister gone. It’s hard to lose her in a fight, at the outbreak of war. It’s hard to move up in the line for the throne. It’s hard to lose the people-” Amethar stopped, realizing the projection that had entered his words. “The  _ person _ who you could always trust and who was always there for you. It’s always going to feel like you should’ve done more, that you should’ve done anything but what you did. But those feelings don’t make it your fault.”

“Don’t they, though?” Ruby asked, pulling away from her father and standing up. “If it wasn’t my fault, then why do I feel so guilty?”

Amethar stood up, pulling Ruby into a tight hug. “You feel guilty because you survived. I felt it, too. All of my sisters, gone, and me, the youngest and dumbest of us all still standing. I felt, I  _ feel _ , guilty for not doing more to protect them. For a long time I thought it was my fault they were gone. But I didn’t kill them. The church did. Calroy did. The war did. I did all that I could to protect them and it hurts to come up short, but I didn’t pull back the bow and fire the shot.  _ You _ didn’t stab the dagger into your sister. Her blood, her death, isn’t on your hands.”

Ruby and Amethar stood there, wrapped in a strong embrace, crying together for what could’ve been an eternity. “Does it get better?” Ruby whispered out.

“It gets worse at first,” Amethar admitted. “But with time and with thought, it gets more palatable. But no matter what, Ruby, I’m gonna be here with you to help you carry this load.”

“Promise?’

Amethar kissed her forehead once more. “Promise.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Comments and kudos are always appreciated but never required. If you like this and want to see me write more D20 stuff, come send me a prompt on [tumblr](https://ireallyneedabetterusername.tumblr.com/). Specifically for D20 I've only gotten through Fantasy High (seasons 1 and 2), Tiny Heist, and all of ACoC that's out so far so if you want me to write it's gonna have to be about those. Thanks again!


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